The Urge

This week has been rough week between stress at work and trying to get back into the swing of school while balancing life, it has taken a toll on my mood and body.

I haven’t been as motivated to workout and my hunger (for sweets) has been out of control (read: stress eating). Believe it or not, I don’t have that big of a sweet tooth. Sure, I love desserts but I’m not the type to eat one everyday or every meal. However, lately all I’ve been craving is sweets and chips. Greeeeeeaaaat combo, eh? Not so much.

In order to fight the urge to give into my every craving and desire, I have been creative in the kitchen lately (just not so good about posting my creativity).

Enter kale chips and carrot fries, or should I say the new objections of my affection.

I’ve been hearing about these babies for awhile now on the blogosphere and I can’t tell you why the heck I’ve waited so long to try them. I mean I already love raw carrots and ketchup (don’t hate until you try).

Truth: I’ve attempted kale chips before and I either over or under cooked them, so I wasn’t a fan until now.

Both require an oven that has been preheated at 350 degrees and I kept the seasoning simple and the same. I coated the fries in a little EVOO, salt, pepper and cumin. Then I meticulously followed Kath’s kale chip instructions, but added pepper and cumin along with salt. Pop these babies into the oven for about 10-12 minutes and you won’t be sorry.

*Tip of the day: I almost always turn on the oven immediately when I get home from work. There are many days that I haven’t the faintest idea what I’m going to cook for dinner and this helps keep my options open without adding a ton of time.

It’s amazing how great the chips turned out, funny how following instructions will do that.

I paired my new lovelies with a sassy lil’ chicken. I seasoned the breasts with mexican seasoning, then gave them a bath in salsa and lastly coated them in crushed tortilla chips. I popped them into my preheated oven for about 35 minutes and the results were heavenly.

What do you do to cope with or pull yourself out of a rut or a funk?

As a result of increased appetite (and consumption), decreased sleep and exercise I’ve been feeling, well….fat. This is really discouraging because for such a long time I haven’t thought or felt this way. Yet, as my sister and I were FB chatting and she was sharing her amazing week (she hit her 80lb goal, can I get a hell ya!), all I wanted to type was….I feel fat.

Let’s get something straight, fat isn’t a feeling and the size of your jeans should never define the love or self-worth you deserve. I resisted the urge to type and even say that thought and instead, had a conversation with my emotions.

While, I probably didn’t come across as the sanest person to my husband, I feel 1000 times better and I know the real emotions that caused me to think and “feel” this way. As school picked up, I immediately got anxious and scared that I would lose my routine and that I would be a failure at balancing everything that is important to me. I’m also scared that I’ll never reach my fitness goals and that I will fall back into my old habits.

Well, instead of honoring my feelings and coming up with ways to deal with them, I suppressed them and exactly what I didn’t want to happen, started to.

Truthfully, this is hard to write about, because I’ve been actively trying to remove negative self talk from my thoughts and communication. However, I’m not perfect (nor do I want to be) and it isn’t realistic to think that I’ll be able to completely remove something that I previously gave so much space in my life too. Even though I’m helping improve my own self image, I’m also doing this for my nieces. The five most amazing little girls, that I’m privileged to have in my life and watch grow up.  I don’t ever want them to hear me say something negative about my body or mind that would cause them to think differently about themselves.

Whenever I think about one of them saying something like, “I’m chubby” or “I’m so ugly” (things I spent many years saying to my own reflection), it breaks my heart and gives me the motivation I need to make sure I’m setting a good example.

I urge you to think about what you are saying about yourself or what your actions are saying about you, because you never know who is listening, watching and learning from you.

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4 thoughts on “The Urge

  1. 1) Turning on the oven right when you get home is such a brilliant idea! One simple step that can save a lot of time.

    2) Bravo to taking control of your actions and realizing that the decisions you make can affect others.

    We all have our days, way to realize it and get past it. 🙂

    • It is so simple but helps tremendously. By the time I’ve changed into comfy clothes, fed the dog and visited with the hubs the oven is pre-heated and I’m ready to think about dinner!

      It was a break-through evening, because there have been many times where I’ve let that “feeling” take over the rest of my day and/or week. Thanks!

  2. I am guilty of that, of ‘talking down’ to myself.

    However, I have been feeling a lot more optimistic and motivated lately, I’ll keep your wise words in mind 🙂

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